2020年5月23日 星期六

Can a Coach Save You From Divorce?

The blogger motivating men to care about emotional labor.
A roundup of new guidance and stories from NYT Parenting.

In a newsletter last year, I (cheekily) suggested that one way to get partners to do their fair share of emotional labor is to become physically incapacitated for several months, like I was when I was pregnant with my younger daughter. This week, Jancee Dunn offers a more viable solution to a mental load imbalance: Hire a coach.

Jancee profiled Matthew Fray, a Cleveland-based blogger who wrote a viral post in 2016 called “She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes By the Sink.” He has since started a business where he motivates men to improve their marriages. His coaching isn’t meant to replace couples counseling; it’s simply encouragement from an average guy who has been through the same thing, he says.

Also this week: More and more parents are giving their children melatonin for sleep issues. Christina Caron, our NYT Parenting staff reporter, does a deep dive into whether it’s safe, and what the best practices are. Melinda Wenner Moyer answers all your questions about Covid-related pediatric multisystem inflammatory syndrome, or P.M.I.S. Though the symptoms are scary, the bottom line is P.M.I.S. is rare and usually treatable. Melinda also looked into whether virtual summer camps are actually worthwhile.

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Finally, we have a very sweet piece from Holly Burns, who interviewed the people who miss our kids, including teachers, nannies and even clowns. “I miss their singing,” Jonathan Zielinski, a teacher in Chicago, told Holly. “I miss laughing with them. I miss the stories they’d tell me in the odd moments between activities. I miss watching them work so I can see their thought process. As I tell them every day, I just miss their faces.”

We want to hear what creative family activities you’ve come up with to replace vacations and camps. Are you pitching a tent in your backyard? Building a makeshift water park out of sprinklers? Tell us all about it.

Thanks for reading!

— Jessica Grose, lead editor, NYT Parenting

P.S. Today’s One Thing comes from Simi Shukla, a mom of two in Manhattan who is getting her master's degree in art therapy. She has been challenging her 6-year-old and 10-year-old to make found object sculptures out of recyclables. “The novelty of it never gets old for them,” she said.

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Tiny Victories

Parenting can be a grind. Let’s celebrate the tiny victories.
We put my 18-month-old grandson, staying with us during the quarantine, in a laundry basket. I attached a belt and fastened it to the handhold on the side. We pulled him fast up and down the hallway while he squealed and held the sides of the basket. It became our version of an amusement-park ride. — Adria Rolnik, New Jersey

If you want a chance to get your Tiny Victory published, find us on Instagram @NYTparenting and use the hashtag #tinyvictories; email us; or enter your Tiny Victory at the bottom of this page. Include your full name and location. Tiny Victories may be edited for clarity and style. Your name, location and comments may be published, but your contact information will not. By submitting to us, you agree that you have read, understand and accept the Reader Submission Terms in relation to all of the content and other information you send to us.

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